Witness is no Teenage Dream, ladies and gents. As a (former) Katy Perry fan, it pains me to say that her fourth studio album is a letdown. Forget anthem-roarers and poptastic hits, Witness is crammed with over-produced electronic songs and awkward sounds that fail to impress.
Katy’s latest work of “art” is a far cry from anything she’s ever recorded. So which tracks fell through? Are there any songs that deserve a spot on my playlist? Here’s a ranking of every song on Witness ranked worst to first…
15. Into Me You See
Katy sounds worn out and tired as she croons throughout the closing track of the album, Into Me You See. I love a Katy ballad but unfortunately there’s nothing on this track that stands out. It’s certainly no Wide Awake or By the Grace of God. Skip it or snooze through it…
14. Mind Maze
You know what? Without the auto-tune and techno-tinges, Mind Maze might not have been so bad. Just when you think Katy’s going to show-off her signature vocals, they’re devoured in special effects and it’s disappointing. Some KatyCats might enjoy getting lost in the hypnotizing melodies, but not me. It’s all too messy.
13. Déjà Vu
I certainly won’t have Déjà Vu ‘running on a loop’. It’s a forgettable filler on Witness that leaves no impression on the listener. If anything, it’s mind-numbing – the repetitive beat and Katy’s “oouus” will send you into a trance, and not in a good way.
12. Hey Hey Hey
Stop trying to make Roar happen again, Katy! Hey Hey Hey is a weak attempt at duplicating the popstar’s iconic tracks. The rock-tinged song may have been co-written by Sia and it may encourage female empowerment but I don’t see it growing on fans anytime soon. Hey Hey Hey gets a bye bye bye from me.
11. Swish Swish
Thank goodness for Nicki Minaj because without her, this song would have been a certified flop. The good? It’s a Taylor Swift diss track. The bad? It sounds cheap – the voice altering effects are cringey and the chorus just sticks out like a sore thumb. Swish Swish has the potential to be someone’s fave but certainly not mine.
10. Miss You More
This ballad is somewhat decent but incredibly forgettable. The sombre and dreamy Miss You More is just another filler on the album but it does come as a breath of fresh air – especially after the horrible Mind Maze. The tone on Witness finally switches gears once this song comes into play, preparing us for the more enjoyable hits on the album…
9. Bigger Than Me
This may be one of the very few tracks that hears Katy back in her comfort zone. Bigger Than Me has a slick production and Katy sounds great but it falls flat and repetitive at times. Unfortunately, there are songs that are bigger and better than this…
I’ve got to admit, this one’s a grower. At first, I almost ranked Tsunami as one of the worst songs on Witness. Only because it’s rather monotonous. A few listens later however, I realized that there are far worse songs on this album. Tsunami may be boring but at least it’s not over-produced and we actually get to hear Katy’s untouched vocals for once.
7. Bon Appetit
Bon Appetit may be one of the most annoying and cringe-worthy tracks Katy’s ever recorded but needless to say, it’s a head-bopper. It’s annoying, but surprisingly it’s addictive, too. The corny lyrics will ironically spoil your appetite (“Eat with your hands, fine, I’m on the menu”?!) but that won’t stop it from being a party anthem this summer…
Although the chorus is a little too loud and in-your-face, Power is undeniably a stand-out track. Katy’s vocals are top-notch and that thunderous heavy beat is actually enjoyable. It’s the potential banger of the bunch – turn it up.
Poker Face Roulette is the perfect sing-a-long song that is sure to get crowds of KatyCats pumped. Sounding very much like a Lady Gaga track, this number has a catchy chorus and fun disco groove. It’s not your typical Katy Perry song but nevertheless, it’s a bop.
Electric pop doesn’t suit Katy Perry – we’ve gathered that after listening to this album. Witness however, is another story. It’s the only upbeat, house-ey track that I enjoyed. It isn’t annoying, nor is it over-produced. It’s almost perfect – almost. If Katy releases it as her next single, I’ll be pleased…
3. Save as Draft
Save as Draft is one of the very few highlights on Witness. I pressed play and I finally felt like I was listening to a Katy Perry album. The break-up ballad is sincere, beautiful and bound to touch your heart. It’s a shame we had to wait until the end of the album to finally hear the real Katy Perry come through.
2. Chained to the Rhythm
I don’t know about you, but Chained to the Rhythm makes me want to hit the dance-floor and show-off my best 80’s dance-moves. It’s catchy, it’s the perfect sing-a-long song and it serves as a brilliant political statement. Katy did good here – too bad I can’t say the same for the rest of her album…
After feeling drained from electronic sounds and futuristic effects, it’s nice to finally hear Katy tone down her sound and step back into traditional pop territory. Katy doesn’t need special effects and plastic sounds to prove she’s a decent popstar. Tracks like Pendulum allow her talent to truly shine. This perfect pop hit is officially the best song on Witness. Not only is it sassy, upbeat and fun, but it’s the most reminiscent of Katy’s earlier stuff.
What’s your favorite song on Witness? Do you even have one? Let me know in the comments below…