20+ Awful Negan Quotes You Can’t Help but Laugh At

negan quotes

Excuse the s**t out of my God damn French, but Negan is freakin‘ funny!

Although he’s been responsible for some of The Walking Dead’s main character deaths, his sick sense of humor has had us in fits of laughter and his cruel and cutting quotes have somehow turned him into a charismatic and comical villain – in fact, he’s been ranked as one of the greatest Walking Dead characters in our list!

As awful as they are, Negan’s punch-lines, insults and “jokes” have undeniably brought some of the best laughs in the bleak world of The Walking Dead.

Think you can hold back the giggles? Here are 22 awful Negan quotes you can’t help but laugh at…

1. At least Negan likes women (a bit too much). It could be worse…

negan quote men

“I don’t enjoy killing women. Men? I can waste them all the livelong.”

2. Negan does not hold back with the metaphors!

negan baboon quote

“Your mouth is all puffed up like a baboon’s ass”

3. He’s not afraid to admit what turns him on…even if it’s bizarre.

negan balls quote

“You see this? This is the kind of thing that just tickles my balls.”

4. At least we know what Negan’s favorite bedtime story was…

negan little pig

“Little pig, little pig – let me in.”

5. You’ve got to admit, Rick’s side-eye does get pretty annoying…

negan rick side eye

“I could never do this with Rick. He would just be standing there, scowling, giving me that annoying side-eye he gives me.”

6. Negan cracks the funniest jokes…at the most inappropriate times…

negan guts quote

“You did have guts. I’ve never been so wrong in my whole life!”

7. He totally believes in karma but, who doesn’t? 

negan lucille quote

“Lucille’s beautiful, smooth surface is never gonna look the same, so why should yours?!”

See Also: Check out this awesome replica of Lucille in our Walking Dead gifts post!

8. Negan’s idea of “freaky-deaky” is totally different from yours but who’s to say we can’t laugh?

negan freaky deaky quote

“I’ve got my fingers crossed for a little freaky deaky.”

9. Negan took a swipe and a slam at Glenn! You definitely shouldn’t be laughing right now, but you are.

negan glenn quote

“I just popped your skull so hard your eyeball popped out, and that s**t is gross.”

10. Negan’s right. Rick does look meaner with a man-bush.

negan rick man bush

“Is that you, Rick? Underneath all that man bush? S**t, I would not have messed with that guy.”

11. Possibly one of the best laugh out loud moments in The Walking Dead?

negan freaky smile quote

“Holy crap, you are creepy as s**t sneaking up on me wearing that collar with that freaky ass smile.” 

12. Negan is a pro at humiliating people…and telling them the truth…

negan dick quote

“In case you haven’t caught on, I just slipped my dick down your throat and you thanked me for it.”

13. Yet another metaphor from Negan that makes you feel bad for laughing…

negan vampire bat

“Lucille is thirsty. She is a vampire bat!”

14. We’re totally using this quote in life! You shouldn’t laugh, but you do anyway.

negan pee pants city

“Pissing our pants?…It’s gonna be pee-pee pants city here real soon.”

15. It’s about time Negan realized that women can be badass too!

negan kamikaze quote

“You got some beach-ball-sized lady nuts coming in kamikaze like that.”

16. Negan is quite the poetic genius, I must say…

prick rick negan quote

“You ever hear the one about the stupid little prick named Rick who thought he knew s**t but didn’t know s**t and got everyone he cared about killed?”

17. Negan’s threats are just as funny as they are scary…

negan shit pants quote

“I hope you got your sh**tin’ pants on. Cause you, are about to s**t your pants.”

18. He’s nobody without Lucille or his leather jacket…

negan leather jacket

“I wear a leather jacket, I have Lucille, and my nutsack is made of steel.”

19. If it ain’t a leather jacket, it’s a “God-damn skin suit”…

“I’m ready for my god damn skin suit!” - Negan

“I’m ready for my god-damn skin suit.”

20. Negan even has something to say about erm, doing the deed with Alpha…

“Does this mean I’ve graduated to the next level of kinky Whisperer s**t?”

21. So, this is Negan’s idea of asking for forgiveness. #Awkward

“I am not going to let you drag me through the mud, filth, and slime to put me down like a dog…Like Glenn was.”

22. What a way to describe the people you hate…

Negan Hornsby quote

“We’re here to take out sh*thead and the d*ckless brigade.”

Hot diggity dog, weren’t those quotes awful! Just like these Walking Dead jokes, Negan’s lines make you feel bad for laughing. He seems to have that effect on people. Admit it, the bat-wielding villain is officially your new guilty pleasure…


Tale Teller

  • Angela Stephanou

    After completing her BA in Communication, Media and Film studies, Angela launched Tell Tales Online, and now writes and oversees the content and strategy across the site. As a pop culture junkie, she follows more celebs than real-life people, her guilty pleasure is watching The Kardashians, but she's also a fan of Marvel and Game of Thrones.

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